“Man up. And choose a lite beer with more taste” (Miller Lite Commercial 2010) Is manhood really defined by what kind of beer we drink and from what kind of bottle? Or maybe it’s defined by the size of my muscles, or maybe the size of something else… Is manhood defined by the car I drive or the house I own? What about the girls I’ve slept with or the people I’ve beaten?

Manhood is severely misunderstood, even in the church. Typically, there are four men found in the church today. The first is the nice church boy, dressed in pastel colors wearing loafers who lacks any kind of leadership ability due to his “neutered” countenance. The second is the man who lost rock, paper, scissors with his wife or girlfriend and was dragged to church. He has no interest in the things of God and is more excited about wasting his life on stupid hobbies or a meaningless career. The third man is simply absent. As the U.S. Congregational Life Survey found in their study called “Key Findings” that the church is 61% women. The men are simply gone.

The fourth man is the man that Paul tells Timothy to look for as he establishes elders in the church in the city of Ephesus.

“The saying is trustworthy: if anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church? He must not be a recent convert, or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil. Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders, so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil” (1 Timothy 3:1-7).

This passage is incredibly important for the church. Through this list and a nearly identical one in Titus 1:5-9 we know whom is allowed to lead in the highest office in the church: Elder/Overseer/Pastor (we see that these were used interchangeably in the New Testament to refer to the highest office in the NT). Church. At Paradox this is the man we are looking for. We will appoint Elders to ministry and we will plant churches. To do this, we need these men. Here’s how this breaks down:

The Man’s Relationship to God:

• He’s a dude. As we’ve discussed previously, our ecclesiology is such that we believe that men hold the highest office in the church. This is very different from the churches in Seattle as a whole and especially the churches around Paradox.
• He’s saved. I’ve actually met, believe it or not, Pastors who weren’t even saved. This is important. If a man is going to lead others to Jesus, he must intimately know Jesus.
• Above reproach. Without character defect or flaw. Does this mean sinless? Of course not. The man must not be hiding any secret sin, but must be openly repentant and continually sanctified.
• Able to teach. Theological understanding. Not necessary theological/classical education and training. I’m not against seminary, but to make a seminary degree a requirement to be a pastor is sinfully adding something to the Scripture that is not there. With that said, it can be incredibly beneficial and helpful.
• Not a recent convert. Must be a mature Christian. Age does not necessarily equal maturity. I’ve met a ton of immature older Christians and some incredibly mature young Christians. The aim is maturity, not age.

The Man’s Relationship to Self:

• Sober-minded. A man who is emotionally stable (not devoid of emotion). He’s not a lake with lots of waves.
• Self-controlled. This takes discipline. An Elder must be a disciplined man.
• Not a drunkard. Without addictions.
• Not a lover of money. Not greedy. Makes wise financial decisions.
• Not arrogant. Humble in posture and personality. Not prideful.

The Man’s Relationship to Other People:

Family:

• Husband of one wife. Literally in the Greek, “one woman man”. He’s not addicted to pornography. Does not have a wandering eye or a flirtatious personality. We do not believe this means that Elders must be married (Paul was not married and neither was Jesus).
• Manages his household well. Provides for the needs of his family. Excels as a husband and father. If not married, organizes his life well (budgets, schedules, and so on).
• Keeping his children submissive. If he’s a daddy, he’s a successful one. He teaches his children the gospel and teaches them to obey his loving leadership.

Others:

• Not violent. Not easily angered and is even tempered.
• Gentle. Kind and loving.
• Not quarrelsome. Not divisive or contentious.
• Well thought of by outsiders. Respected by people outside the church. This assumes the man has relationships outside the church.
• Hospitable. Welcomes people into his life, especially non-Christians for the purpose of evangelism.

The Biblical Duties of an Elder:

In addition to the qualifications of an Elder the Bible speaks of many of the duties that Elders are required to fulfill as shepherds of God’s children. As one aspires to the office of Elder, they must understand the qualifications and the Biblical duties that are assigned to Elders. The duties of an Elder include but are not limited to:

• Study of Scripture (Acts 8:4)
• Teaching the bible soundly and accurately (Ephesians 4:11-12; 1 Timothy 3:2; 2 Timothy 1:13; Titus 1:9)
• Leading/ruling the church (1 Timothy 5:17-18)
• Managing the church (1 Timothy 3:4-5)
• Rightly using money and power for God’s glory (1 Peter 5:1-3)
• Preaching (1 Timothy 5:17; 2 Timothy 4:1-2)
• Instructing/teaching Christians (1 Timothy 6:2; 1 Timothy 6:17)
• Using the authority that has been given to them by God carefully and with excellence (Acts 20:28)
• Giving an account before God for the church (Hebrews 13:17)
• Living lives that are exemplary for the church (Hebrews 13:7)
• Lovingly caring for the people in the church (1 Peter 5:2-5)
• Protecting the church from false teachers and refuting false teaching (Acts 20:17-31; 1 Timothy 1:3-5; 2 Timothy 4:14; Titus 1:9-11)
• Praying for the sick (James 5:14-15)
• Disciplining unrepentant Christians for the purpose of holiness (Matthew 18:15-18)

Conclusion:

At Paradox we take these qualifications very seriously. We’ve developed a whole process through which Elders are appointed to serve to the mission and equip others to do the work of the ministry.

Some may read this and say, “I’m not called to be an elder, so this doesn’t matter to me”. I would disagree. My question would be, what is your aim? Do you have any aim in life? Do you have a bullseye? You need to be aiming for something, because if you have no plan, you will accomplish nothing. If you aim for nothing, you’re sure to hit it every time. If you call yourself a Christian man, it should be Biblical manhood. Not stupid Miller Lite manhood. You can do this by living up to the qualifications of an elder as outlined in the Scriptures.

So what are you aiming at?